Thursday, May 31, 2012

When doing nothing is the most sensible thing to do

My shoulder injury has been getting better. I've been putting it through tests like air drumming to punk and metal songs and I haven't felt any pain so that's a good thing. Around the same time I injured my back and it wasn't even from derby. It was at work and I had to fill in for the delivery driver who was off sick. I had to lug some portable air con's up the stair's for the customer. I didn't ask for help, when I really should have because I struggled lifting them up so of course I ended up hurting my back. After all the injury problems I've had since I started derby this incident finally broke me. I knew I was going to have to spend another spell on the sidelines and then play catch up AGAIN. The amount of injuries I've had to date from derby is beyond ridiculous, some were just bad luck but most of them came down to me. I did some soul searching and tried to work out what I was doing that was making me so self destructive. For most of my life I've never liked to be perceived as weak, whether it was keeping everything inside, not crying in front of others, having to prove to everyone that I could do anything and wasn't a piker. I did it all, but by showing how 'tough and strong' I was I ended up actually making myself weaker and my body kept breaking down. You only have to look at the sport we play, we got knocked down, we get back up. I've seen skaters grimmacing in pain from a big hit or fall during a bout and somehow continue on. You have to be strong on one level to keep taking the hits otherwise you'll be too scared to take a hit which isn't the right attitude to have. I need to work on finding the line between 'toughen up princess' and knowing I'm injured. I'm not going to get it right from the get go but if I don't change my outlook I'm forever going to be stuck in this cycle of never progressing far enough to be able to actually bout because my body keeps breaking down. I've been off skates the past few weeks and I finally got to see the physio. Apparently I've got muscular strain in my back. I've been following her orders and if all goes well I'll be back on skates next Friday night.

While I've been off skates I've been going to some of our training sessions to watch and it's amazing how much you can really see on the sidelines. It's been amazing to see the progress of some of our skaters whether it's the more established skaters scrimmaging for the first time or the freshies who started recently. I swear some of them are already better than me. It'll only be a matter of time before you see the likes of Foggy, Shorley Tremble, Fear my Phat, Posh Deck'em, Butter Scream and Punkie Brawlstar bouting for us soon and they're all going to be awesome. I'm proud of my league and how far we've come in the short space of time. I want to achieve everything I can with them whether it's competing at TGSS or competing in a best of three series with NRDL (I'm going to pester both sides until they cave in hehe). I can't wait for the day I represent HARD on the track, it'll mean a lot to me. 

I went to the NRDL Smashleys vs Hellcats bout a couple of weeks ago with a few of my team mates. I ended up sitting next to CCRG El Presidente Sir Gestive while I was taking notes for the write up. He was great fun to watch the bout with. I laughed a lot :D The bout itself was great to watch. I picked up a few new things and got to see Jilla jam again which is always lots of fun. A while back I said on this blog that the next Newy bout I was going to work up the courage to go up to Brigand Strong and tell her how amazing a skater I thought she was. Well I worked up the courage but she wasn't even bouting that night, so epic fail on that wish! I've since discovered that she's as shy as me so this is going to make for an interesting intro next time I'm up there to watch a Newy bout hehe.

So why all the fascination with Brigand Strong? Newy are blessed with lots of kick arse skaters in their league. I came to this realisation the more Newy bouts I started watching. I remembered the first bit of advice that Jilla ever gave me when she said not to pigeon hole myself into one position for derby. It hit home when I started paying attention to both sides and not just the Smashleys. Although she's a Hellcat, Brigand Strong's performance were catching my eye. She was tall but built enough to be able to take a hit and dish one out with interest. She could also block AND jam equally effective which made her the complete player. That was the moment I started changing my own goals where instead of just wanting to be a good blocker, I wanted to be a good allrounder so that if I was ever needed to jam for my team, I'd be able to step up. Yeah I wouldn't be like Winnie Bruise but I wanted to be able to do the job. I could also relate to not being one of the big personalities on the track. People might not notice Brigand Strong because she's not one of the loud ones but you can bet your bottom dollar if she wasn't playing she'd be sorely missed by the Hellcats or the Dames. If anyone was ever going to threaten to break up the big two that is Cherry and Jilla, it would be Brigand Strong. OHHHH big call, right? haha. That's how awesome of a skater I think she is :)     

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